|Andrew Lindemann Malone's Internet Playpen|
I reviewed films regularly for about four years. Over the past two or so years, I have conclusively proven to myself that I don't want to do that anymore, by repeatedly aborting reviews while in progress and by not watching all that many movies. Nevertheless, I had a lot of fun reviewing movies, and so here's the evidence for your leisured perusal:
Ass-kicking by hand, by bullet, or by explosive device. Always close to my heart.
Films more about themselves as films than anything else.
I like laughing, so a lot of these reviews are overenthusiastic.
Those emotions not born of fear, adrenaline or laughter that nevertheless drive us onward.
Things that actually happened, as captured on film.
People from counties that speak other languages also like to make films. I like to watch those films and read their languages.
Most horror movies are bad. But at least I can unload on them with my venomous prose.
Basically action movies with impressive-sounding fake technology words and weird clothing.
As a special bonus for reading all the way to the bottom of the page, here are two more categories presented for your easy reference:
I can't believe this is all free!
If this page is unattractive, you may want to consider
ditching Netscape. If it's still unattractive, well, that's my fault.